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How to Successfully Choose a Therapist

2011-08-31T15:26:37Z

With so many different kinds of disciplines within the therapy field, and not to mention the multitude of practitioners practicing in these various fields it can be a daunting thing to find someone who will be able to fit well with and can help you without trying out many different people and or wasting a lot of money. In this blog I will give you tips and tools to help you easily find a health professional that will complement you and be truly effective, providing you exactly the service you want for the money you spend.

Before you even begin to look at various websites, phonebooks, or different networks that health professionals advertise in the process begins at home with you. The following is the to 8 questions you need to ask yourself so you can know what kind of professional and person you want to hire, and what actual healing modality you wish to use, whether professional or natural (holistic).

Letting Go of Being Overwhelmed

2011-08-03T14:16:49Z

I had someone recently pose the question “how do you begin to let go?” This letting go can be of items, beliefs, ideas, things we want to do or ways we want to be, even fantasies, anything a person can hold onto. For this particular person (we shall call her Tamera) it was of holding onto everything. Tamera had recently been in a course where they explained that many of us start to accumulate many lifetimes of wants, desires, and “things we should be doing” and we put all these into a wheelbarrow and push these wheelbarrows everywhere with us depleting our energy and taking up mental space. She found this analogy greatly beneficial for her own understanding and so we will continue to use it here. In every aspect of Tamera’s life she was holding onto something, overwhelming herself and her wheelbarrow to the point where she found herself unable to accomplish anything and dissatisfied because she could never get to do everything she wished to do.

She wanted to let go of things and indeed logically she even understood exactly what she needed to let go of and how to do it, but what she didn’t understand is why she couldn’t bring herself to actually take those steps. Now I am not discussing actual physical hoarding here; that is a little different. The missing link was the internal dynamics that were at play. The first was a varying list of negative beliefs that were keeping her where she was, stuck in a never-ending cycle of breakdowns and the sky is falling thinking. These negative beliefs basically say “You have to do xyz, or you are a failure, bad, not normal, unworthy” etc. They also skewed her vision of reality, an example of this was that everything she does including her passions and hobbies has to bring in an income and if they don’t then she shouldn’t be allowed to do them or have them. After bringing these belief systems to light she was able to let them go, and re-claim her power and right to have self-time, hobbies and enjoy her ‘free time’ free from pressure. This inevitably allowed her to be more productive and happy in the job that actually makes the money.

The second internal aspect that was playing out was the romanticized fantasies of certain things. When we have a romantic idea of what we want to do, or how we want a situation or relationship to be, we run into trouble because our romantic fantasies rarely match up to reality. Tamera had many of these and instead of allowing things to be as they are she would put so much pressure on each situation until she couldn’t take it and so avoided and didn’t do it anyway. The language she used was, “well I can’t let go of that, because I really want to do that one day as it could turn into something great.” If we can learn to let go of our romanticizing and learn to just let things be, we eventually feel deep peace and joy. Tamera found that she was finally able to let go of vast amounts of “crap” in her wheelbarrow freeing up so much energy and mental space that she was finally able to take part in and experience what was truly important to her, not just that she should be doing everything in her wheelbarrow.

The biggest lesson to her was that she allowed herself to empty the wheelbarrow, and if something is truly meant to be part of this lifetime then it will re-appear again at the right time when she can truly enjoy it.

So what can we learn from this and how can it help each of us in our own lives and journeys? The following list of questions can help you to clarify your own internal dynamics that are at play and hopefully help you to take the first step forward to what you truly want. FYI in the following bullets ….. will represent the thing you are holding onto. It can also be beneficial to first look at what you are ready to let go of and then go through the process to actually let go.

If you are holding onto and can’t let of something that is bringing you stress, anxiety, negativity or just plain fear ask yourself the following questions:

· What are the Beliefs that I hold around this …..? (thing you are holding onto)

· Have I romanticized this ….. and if so how, and what is reality?

· If I let go of ….. then (write in what comes up.)

· Or alternately: If I let go of ….. then what will happen?

· What emotions are at play while I am contemplating ….. and are they holding me back?

The Next step will be looking at what you really want and what is truly important to you. You can do this in the ‘love state’ if it helps. In most cases we need to know where we are going in order to actually make progress and move forward. If all we do is move away from what we don’t want we never end up going anywhere.

· What do I really want?

· What do I really want to be doing – right now or in the future?

· What is truly important to me?

· What do I love doing?

· What do I find inspiring and gives me passion?

The other questions you can ask to help you come to a resolution and get closure are:

· What else is in the way of me letting go of …..?

· What do I need to do in order to let go of …..?

· What lesson(s) do I need to learn in order to let go of …..?

· What would help me to let go of …..? (Example more information on a specific situation etc.)

Now the final step is actually letting go, this may mean selling something, moving, grieving, changing, simply allowing yourself to be ok or erasing some frivolous items off the wheelbarrow list. I personally found it helpful when letting go of sentimental objects that were beginning to over clutter and stress me out by visualizing taking the memory and emotion associated with the object back so that I always have that. (Taking a digital image to remember can also be helpful as they don’t take up space.) There are also many, many ways to do this ‘letting go,’ whether it be through meditation, physical throwing out/donating, or a sacred ceremony, what matters is that however you let go of things it gives you closure and allows you to find joy and peace.

Joy and Peace to all,

Charlotte Brammer

Listening to Your Intuition

2011-06-29T14:31:52Z

Animal Illumination Summer Blog

Last evening I thought to myself that I should go out to visit one of my two horse herds. I had a thought that I needed to go visit them and spend some time. I had been out earlier in the day and as I was behind in my other activities I decided not to go.

In the summer the horses are out 24/7 in the big pastures and are able to graze and spend some great time just being in their natural state. Some will come in throughout the day to work, train, or be part of a FEEL exercise. I go out daily and check on them all, putting sunscreen on the 2 that have pink noses and fly spray everyone on the days that they need it.

Yesterday morning I spent some time with my young gelding working on his groundwork giving him some exercise, grooming and attention. I checked the rest of the herd then went on with my day. The thought in the evening to visit them again was not unusual but I still decided not to go out as they were far out in the fields.

At 2am I awoke from sleep with a strong knowing that the horses needed water. I started to think in my mind; when did I fill the trough last, did I check it in the morning, etc. I rationalized that there must be water and I could wait till the morning. I couldn’t fall back asleep and the thought kept haunting me for another hour. I considered going out to check it and then decided not to as there are coyotes and other animals out there in the night. Daylight would only be a couple hours away.

At 6am I awoke and went straight out to the horses and what did I find; the water trough turned over and empty. Sometimes the horses will play with it and turn it over but they didn’t do that this year so that didn’t cross my mind. As they all got their fill of water I felt badly that I didn’t pay attention to my intuition last evening. The thought was strong that I should go out and visit them but I thought it was more for my sake not theirs.

I cherish the time I go out in the fields spending time with their loving energy. They calm me, and I feel all the stress of the day leave my body; I become one with the herd. I had assumed that was the need I was l craving so dismissed it.

I wanted to write about this experience today as I am sure many of you have had similar experiences where subtle yet strong messages and thoughts come to you and it is often hard to know where they come from. Do they come from our logical minds or from our innate knowing, our intuition? Our Western culture has trained us to be in our logical minds and we rationalize our feelings and thoughts to fit into a convenient box. Sometimes the thoughts are abstract and indirect so we have to figure out what they mean. If the message in the evening was “go check the horse’s water trough” well, I would have listened.

I learned a valuable lesson through this experience and luckily the horses were perfectly fine through the night with no water. I learned I need to listen to my knowing mind more and stop my logical mind from rationalizing the messages, feelings, urges, and thoughts that come to me. Again, I have to thank the horses who teach me daily to live in the moment and cherish the natural gifts we all have.

Integrating the Healing Blogs - Part 2

2011-06-09T13:49:39Z

First I would like to apologize for this post being a day late. There were mass thunderstorms yesterday and I couldn't risk my computer. Here is the second half of last weeks blog!!

Integrating the Healing Blogs - Part 2

So continuing forward with our example of Susan; if Susan brought awareness through the love place into this dynamic she would find that it isn’t her weight stopping her from finding love but that she in fact isolates herself from this possibility. She never goes to work functions, has a very small net of friends, which she never deviates from and rarely goes out to social events. If she does go to a social event her belief that she is unlovable translates into her being introverted and then blowing of any advances that guys make.

The food and weight dance in essence became her scapegoat, her way of not having to look at the fact that she herself was stopping love in her life through her behaviors. These behaviors are her defense mechanisms that are keeping the pain of not being good enough, being bad and unworthy of love as a child suppressed. To her having a loving relationship in her adult life was terrifying because it might actually prove that she is bad, and unworthy of love causing her unbearable pain.

In actuality the goals of the love and fear place are very similar: the goals of the fear place are: to meet a need, whatever that need may be – love, safety, etc. and to avoid pain. The goals of the love place are to meet a need, whatever that need may be – love, safety etc. and to heal, let go of and transcend pain, (this is where they differ.) The benefit to healing, letting go of and transcending your pain is this: it frees all the energy you were using to maintain all the walls keeping your pain in, the pain no longer exists on any level and so instead of continually feeling it over and over and over again you never have to feel it again, you learn new understanding, lessons and wisdom that help you to be successful in the rest of your life and more importantly you can start moving forward, being happy and achieving what you want to achieve enjoying your life instead of being perpetually stuck in your ever increasing pain cycle.

For Susan this means that she would finally be able to understand that she is perfectly worthy of love and that she is good. She can finally forgive those that hurt her as a child once she realizes that they were acting out of their own fear places, and their hurtful behavior was the only way they knew to keep their own pain away. It really had nothing to do with Susan other then she triggered her parent’s, siblings, friends etc. own pain. Learning how to align to all this new information and live more from her true self, now that it isn’t buried under all that pain and unhealthy dynamics, she can finally have a fulfilling and loving relationship with herself and a romantic partner. A byproduct of these new relationships and information is that it eliminated her need to overeat and she is now able to clearly see new situation and advances as what they really are.

Up until now we have been using our love place to understand where we are operating and making choices from and then understanding the truth in our current situation. The Centered Awareness technique is the flip side to this and its extension. CAT will allow you to search out and find anything that causes you pain without you having to be in a direct situation that is triggering that pain; which will allow you to see it clearer then if you were in the middle of say a strong emotion. It is just another tool that you can use to find blocks. A block is anything that is keeping you from achieving natural wellness. Once you find a block you can then apply tools, and techniques to heal and let go of it. In some cases as in the example I shared in the blog Drama Versus Peace all that is needed is to recognize what is happening and then do something different.

Ultimately what each dynamic and block requires will be different, even though the healing formula remains the same. In the end you ultimately hold the knowledge of what exactly that is and the power to learn what you need to do and how to heal it. For me this is a never ending process, one that I enjoy and am passionate about. Although, if you asked me how much I enjoy the process when I am in the middle of one of my blocks my degree of enjoyment may be different. The outcome and the benefits are always worth it because with each block we heal the happier and freer we become.

Wishing the very best to all in all situations,

Charlotte Brammer

Integrating the Healing Blogs - Part 1

2011-06-01T16:56:00Z

Before I get to the main content of this blog where we will explore and integrate all the healing blogs I have posted this far, I would just like to take a moment to thank everyone who has read and everyone who has commented on our blogs. Your comments are greatly appreciated, both positive and negative comments, as they help us learn what you value and how the information we are passionate about can help or inspire our readers.

This Blog will be separated into two parts. I will post part two 2, Wednesday June 8th, one week from today, I truly hope you enjoy.

Integrating the Healing Blogs - Part 1

I have continued to contemplate my experiences since my last blog where I talked about turning inwards and focusing on the aspects of my external world that are incongruent with my internal world and then making changes to find harmony. For clarity, and so I don’t have to type in a paragraph every time I wish to refer to this internal/external tool I will call it the Centred Awareness Technique or CAT for short. So much has happened since then and as I continue to learn, study, teach and grow I am constantly reminded how connected everything is and how through clarity I have access to everything I need right now. This access of course includes knowledge, wisdom and understanding. At the time of my last blog I was unsure how this new information would integrate and shape the foundations of what I already understood, such as the fear versus love place and healing in general. What I came to realize was that this new tool I developed was actually just the extension or the next step of the “Love Place.” Before I can explain and clarify what I mean by that I need to first paint a picture of the human experience and exactly how the love place benefits our daily, short and long term lives.

Each person at their core is their True Self, you can call it divinity, the higher self, enlightenment, god within etc. but this core is perfectly intact and no matter what life has thrown us, this core stays perfectly whole and beautiful. As we grow, have life experiences and find our selves hurt, betrayed and violated we grow a wall of anger, shame, guilt, sorrow, grief; basically a wall of pain around this true self.

Every creature on this planet has the instinct to avoid pain; this can mean physical, emotional and even mental pain. In order to avoid feeling our pain we develop a myriad of beliefs, definitions, behaviours, defence mechanisms, addictions, patterns and ingrained dynamics that we play out. All of these things can be triggered into action, without our direct awareness of what is actually happening, in response to present situations that we perceive are similar to past situations that initially created the pain. These present situations not only hold the potential for new pain in our eyes, but they also hold the ability to remind us of our past and so make us feel the pain we are trying to avoid.

This dynamic of avoiding pain is the basis of our “fear place” and why it never benefits us when we make decisions and react to situations from this place. When we re-act out of avoidance and fear, we are basing our decisions on information from the past, this information rarely actually has anything to do with the current moment and the situation we find ourselves in. Keeping that in mind how can we expect an outcome that we want or need, that is helpful and beneficial to all involved, if we aren’t making our decisions based on all the information we have access to about our current situation? We can’t, and often in fact we create the exact opposite outcome of what we want. Unfortunately this alternate and opposite outcome often causes us more pain, which not only adds to our previous pain but also reaffirms the beliefs and dynamics that caused the alternate outcome in the first place. Can anyone see a circular downward pattern here?

A really simple example of this is someone who attributes the lack of love in their life to how they look. In this example, we will call her Susan, Susan is overweight and believes that this extra weight is the reason she can’t find love in her life; this leads her to eat. The food does two things for her, one it momentarily provides a loving relationship and two it stuffs down her feelings of loneliness, shame, isolation and despair. This leads to her never loosing weight and when she doesn’t loose weight she eats. Cyclical cycle.

So what can break the cycle? In one simple word ‘Awareness.’ When we shine light on, illuminating and bringing understanding to what we are doing and why, we can make different choices leading to what we really want. In other words when we realize something isn’t working we can choose to do something else that does work. In order to create this change however we need to come from a different place within ourselves; in other words, we can no longer operate from our fear place or we will just be repeating all our negative patterns that cause us pain. This is where the love place comes in. In the blog A New Chapter you learnt how to make a map of your fear and love places so you could tell the difference. Then in the blog Love Encompassing you learnt tools and techniques to help you stop the downward cycle of the fear place and embody your love place. Now we will look at how and why this will benefit you and then take it to the next level.

In essence our love place allows us to embody our true self, when we are unable to exist 100% in our true self due to pain and the various defences and dynamics we’ve created, our love place becomes like our road map to our own natural wellness. Referring back to blog Footsteps to Natural Wellness we learnt that Natural Wellness is when we are at our most balanced and grounded, it is our ideal state. This means that we are truly living in the moment, connected to our bodies, emotions, clear positive creative mind and spirit. It is when we are guided by trust, truth, love, and intuitive urges that continually manifest our best destinies. We are completely joyous, whole, free and inspired. Energy flows and peaks outwards in a limitless cascade and opens our hearts in a radiant profusion of love. This ‘ideal state’ or ‘natural wellness’ is the complete embodiment of the true self.

When we are in our love place it allows us to see things from a different perspective, one of peace, conscious awareness, clarity and non-judgment. In our love place we bring ourselves forward into the present moment allowing us to see the truth of, and in, our present situation as well as allowing us to recognize what aspects of our past are being triggered and which dynamics jump into action to stop the pain. In other words it presents us with all the information, to allow us to make conscious choices that more often then not actually benefit us and create for us what we want and need. Granted there are times that in order to move forward we need to heal, change, re-form, forgive or let go of something before we can make a new choice and begin to embody our true self, what the love place will give you is the ability to discern what you need in each moment and situation.
For the Conclusion check back next Wednesday June the 8th.

Wishing the very best to all in every situation,
Charlotte Brammer

May Blog

2011-05-04T15:33:00Z

Have you ever felt the mixed feelings of exhilaration and sadness all at the same time, well that is how I am feeling right now. I am so excited to announce that this past weekend I graduated from Horse Spirit Connections FEEL program. I am now a Certified FEEL Facilitator, YAHOO!

FEEL stands for Facilitated Equine Experiential Learning and is an amazing modality to help awaken and illuminate people on their own life path. The key difference for FEEL vs. other modalities is the use of horses with the program. Horses bring a unique gift of mirroring our thoughts and feelings back to us to allow us to be aware and provide us the learning opportunities that are always perfect for us at that time.

I will write in upcoming blogs my own personal transformation and experiences during the past 6 months while on the program, so stay tuned.

At the same time I am feeling sadness upon completion of the program as I have met a family of people in my course that I truly have grown, shared and experienced such wonderful life lessons with. I admire and respect every one of them and I am sad we will no longer have the group sessions that have been so valuable to me. I know I will stay in touch with my extended family as they have become my sisters and brother.

One key learning this program has given me is the emotional intelligence to know what I am feeling, how to embrace those emotions and honour them as an inner wisdom, just as the horses do.

My excitement also extends out to the future as I am now able to provide individual sessions and group workshops for others to share in this magnificent experience. The Oasis Farm and Wellness Centre’s first FEEL workshop is scheduled for May 28^th and May 29^th called Light Horse / Dark Horse – Exploring Your Untapped Potential. Special introductory pricing is available for this session. No prior horse experience is necessary to take part in any FEEL workshop or session, as all work is done on the ground. Visit the website or contact us for more information.

Words cannot describe the blessings the horses bring and I look forward to sharing them with you.

Blessings,

Ingrid Brammer

Drama Versus Peace

2011-03-25T20:32:00Z

I have recently been taking some time for self-reflection to discover what my heart yearns for. The answer was simplistically surprising, likeness. When I am centred in my heart it is a sensation or feeling of expanded joy and immense peace, I realized that what I am truly looking for is an external representation of that inner experience; a harmonic likeness, a balance and congruity between my inner and outer worlds. For my outer world to reflect my inner one would mean that I am living my truth which is the ultimate freedom, and so I began to look at where my external world is incongruent with this experience.

While it is profoundly true that I can create any internal experience (emotion) regardless of what is happening externally around me, some of my own actions are creating discomfort, anxiety and stress in my life, it is these actions that I knew I needed to focus on. It was a theme for me involving money, of existing in a perpetual state of having just enough and an inability to use what extra I would receive to promote peace. Instead I would continually spend any surplus, keeping myself locked in a place of disharmony. This causes me to feel anxious, regretful (often over buying something frivolous I didn’t actually want only to fulfill some need I didn’t realize I was trying to fill… unsuccessfully I might add) and perpetually adrift.

This drama I re-enact on a monthly basis at one point in time used to give me something I needed, perhaps it was a distraction from things I wished I didn’t have to do, or a way to feel alive? Whatever the benefit used to be, it has come and gone a long time ago and yet left me with an unfulfilling behaviour. What I really need became instantly clear once I looked at my theme through the eyes of my inner experience, through the peace I was feeling. To be financially unburdened (free of debt) and the peace that that would bring to me is of far more benefit then what ever thrill I get from buying that amazing pair of Steve Madden Open Toe Red Pumps on sale. Drama for the sake of Drama was a cage that I perpetually put myself in, I didn’t realize I was doing it but the feelings it created were perfectly evident. The next and final step in my epiphany will be the actual physical achievement of the congruity my soul is striving for, and I know taking it one step at time I can achieve it.

This way of finding out information was a new one for me and I plan to use it again, it was so profound and yet simple. This experience not only helped me to transform a very negative and self-abusive tendency but it reformed how I think of healing in general. I am still unsure of how this transformation will turn out as the ideas and feelings are still forming and I will keep you updated. Until then try to centre yourself and find what your heart is yearning for and then look for areas of your life that are incongruent with your soul’s need. We all yearn to be free, to be joyous, and to live in harmony even if we don’t know it in so many words, today I found my words and they were that peace is worth more to me then drama.

Wishing all the very best to all in every moment,

Charlotte Brammer

Footsteps to Natural Wellness

2011-02-11T19:11:00Z

In this weeks blog I would like to take some time and explore some of the things that I have been contemplating recently which is the nature of wellness and healing and the belief systems that get in our way. Healing is a process that is unique to each of us; it is an exploration and illumination of our needs, beliefs, thought systems and the foundations from which we operate and then enriching our lives in various ways from the information we find. There are many blocks and obstacles throughout this process that can create resistance. I have been exploring one block in general and it happens to be a belief system that has grown so large it has become the foundation by which we live our lives; this belief system is the word Normal.

Normal has become our belief system and description for almost everything of true relevance in our lives. From our day-to-day habits, fears, dreams and social relationships to our children’s educational development and our personal health care. In actuality we use and compare every aspect of ourselves, who we are, what we look like, how we behave, what we want, what we do and where we go, to how we live, feel, think, and even in some cases worship. The way we have come to use and associate this word is debilitating and restrictive. There are even institutions that have been put into place throughout history to rehabilitate people when they are seen as abnormal; in current medicine we aren’t evaluated on our own personal state of wellness but to a “norm” with little to no grey areas.

As we begin to heal ourselves, we slowly move away from ‘normal’ and return to a state I like to call ‘our natural state.’ This can be hard at first, as the word normal seems to have a way of holding us fast in fear, fear of judgment, criticism, isolation or ridicule. In order to truly begin feeling better we must let go of this unhealthy word ‘normal’ and the judgmental system it has created and instead replace it with natural. A part of changing how we feel and or behave is first changing the way we think, this is why it is vitally important to listen when you use the word normal or when it is being used on you; pay attention as well to the judgmental thoughts or evaluation’s we make in its presence. As with anything it only takes vigilance to recognize and illuminate what is happening and then it is as simple as choosing another way.

When we let go of this belief system and begin to truly start living ‘our natural state,’ even if it is slowly one bit at a time, we begin to experience conformation that we can be safe and be ourselves. When we embrace our needs and start to fulfill our desires and passions because they make us feel ecstatic, energized and like we are contributing, instead of acting and behaving to fit into a norm, we release all resistance, stress and anxiety and no longer feel depressed or debilitated. So how do we know when we are being authentic versus fitting in to social standards? The simple answer is look from where you are operating, is it your love place or your fear place? (The Blog, ‘A New Chapter’ covered love versus fear.) When we begin to live more and more naturally we begin to operate from a place I call natural wellness.

Natural Wellness is when we are at our most balanced and grounded, it is our ideal state. This means that we are truly living in the moment, connected to our bodies, emotions, clear positive creative mind and spirit. It is when we are guided by trust, truth, love, and intuitive urges that continually manifest our best destinies. We are completely joyous, whole, free and inspired. Energy flows and peaks outwards in a limitless cascade and opens our hearts in a radiant profusion of love. How each one of us experiences this and ultimately gets to this place are vastly different and unfortunately it is something that can never be conceptually understood but must be felt and experienced. On our journeys to natural wellness we glimpse beautiful and awe inspiring moments of simplistic radiance where we experience what some call enlightenment but that I call our ideal state. These moments usually come after or during ah ha moments, or when we clear out a large amount of baggage and old toxic emotions, and they can be overwhelmingly beautiful.

It is the experience of this inner expansion where just for an instant everything has culminated into a perfect moment where everything is exactly as it should be that we can glimpse true joy and fulfillment. The journey to this ideal state is always interesting, informative and groundbreaking filled with ah ha moment’s laughter and tears. We can walk this journey alone, surrounded by friends and together, and we can always choose why and how we take each step.

I am currently developing a course around these ideas and it is called Inner Connections. Inner Connections will help you begin to define your inner world and what your own personal state of natural wellness looks and feels like; it will give you tools and help you build a foundation so that you can move forward and reach this ideal state with love, support and inspiration.

Charlotte Brammer

Facilitated Equine Experiential Learning (FEEL)

2011-02-02T01:00:00Z

Facilitated Equine Experiential Learning (FEEL) is becoming more and more recognized as a formal personal growth discipline. Horses have a way of opening our hearts to connect to our authentic self and allow us to truly listen to our inner voices. The key to FEEL is that we learn from doing – Experiential Learning. There are various exercises designed for the horse and human interaction that bring about profound thoughts that can help teach us what we need to know.

In November of 2010 I started the 6 month certification process to become a certified FEEL Facilitator. Horses have had a deep impact on my life in the past 13 years and they continue to surprise and delight me. During the course the group first experiences the exercises themselves before learning how to teach and facilitate others. What I experienced in the first 2 days of the course alone brought light to some real issues I wasn’t even aware were influencing my life.

One of the exercises is called Reflective Round Pen. I first had to select a horse that I wanted to work with. We had already met the horses at the farm and I intuitively knew I wanted to work with a horse named Redman. Then Redman and I went into a 60’ round pen together.

I asked Redman to help me find a way to live healthy boundaries. I had a stick with me to draw a line where I wanted the horse to stay and not come close into my personal space. He respected the line and stood as I opened a heart connection with him. In silence we stood as I felt the emotions in my body and clear thoughts started to come in.

“To set healthy boundaries, do it from the heart. Open the heart, not close it down. Explain to the person the way you feel, and what new rules / contracts you will set to not let your boundaries be dishonoured. Then leave them with love and stay true.”

I decided to set the stick down in the middle and as I did that Redman came into my personal space and again I received the follow thoughts.

“You will need to have some tools to draw upon to help you incorporate your new insights into your life.”

Since that weekend I have incorporated a love approach, an open heart and compassion when asking family members, friends, co-workers and even my animals when I notice a boundary issue. The experience truly has given me the awareness when this issue comes up in my life and how to deal with it in a compassionate healthy way.

This one example was very powerful for me and as I continue my studies and practice sessions the learning just keeps on coming.

I am so excited to announce The Oasis Farm and Wellness Centre will be offering FEEL workshops and individual sessions starting May 2011 and truly hope that others will experience such beneficial journeys as I have.

Reiki For Kids

2010-12-08T13:44:00Z

Reiki is the magic that we need to teach our children.

Children are magical beings in just who they are. With Reiki, children become empowered and self aware, making their world a better place and, in effect, changing our world as well. Children are our future teachers, guides and leaders. Teaching them Reiki enables their clarity and confirms their natural abilities as healers. Why make our children wait to discover the splendor of Reiki and what it could bring to them?

When you bring together the candor and wonderment of children with the energy of Reiki you create the opportunity for magic here on Earth.

Children are so unencumbered to life’s experience and that makes them the ideal channel for Reiki energy. A Reiki Master asked her niece if she could give her Reiki because she was having an asthma attack. Her niece said it was OK so she did Reiki over her head a few inches not touching her. She asked her niece if she could feel anything and her niece answered that she felt warmth. She asked where she felt it, and her niece replied, “in my heart.” Her four year old niece had captured the essence of Reiki Healing: love. Adults question and sometimes struggle with the concept of Reiki, but children just know it so clearly.

Learning Reiki will keep children open as the natural channel that they are.

Ways Reiki Benefit Kids at School:

Reiki:

Boosts and strengthens the immune system
Reduces stress & anxiety
Increases vitality
Improves concentration
Kids focus better in school
Increases mental clarity
Promotes creativity
Enhances relaxation and sleep
Is calming and balancing
Children develop life skills that they will take into adult life
Gives children a way to deal with the stresses of growing up and school

Reiki is quite literally a first-aid kit in the hands that are always with them. If they or a friend get hurt during a sporting event or on the school yard, they can apply first aid themselves and relieve the pain, reduce swelling, stop bleeding and relax the person that is hurt.

An eight-year-old student who's been practicing for three years said, "Reiki has helped me in a lot of situations when I was really hurt. It calmed me down and made me feel better."

Reiki teaches the principles of respecting all life on Earth, but most importantly themselves. It encourages compassion and a feeling of connection to living things - plants, trees, animals - that children will carry forward into their relationships with people. They learn valuable lessons in compassion, because they are able to give healing energy to family, friends and their pets as they instinctively lay their hands on those that they want to help.

Reiki energy healing can be instrumental in developing and encouraging self awareness and self empowerment in a child’s learning experience guiding them to their highest potential. They learn self-care and self-reliance, as they use the energy to help themselves, wherever they are, at anytime. Kids no longer feel helpless to help because, with Reiki, they are ready to deal with whatever might happen.

Reiki Kids fall asleep easier and also have better sleep leaving them well rested with increased energy levels needed to face the new school day and its’ challenges . They can fight off the colds and flu that sap them of their energy and cause them to miss school (sometimes falling behind with their lessons) because of the immune boosting abilities of Reiki. ``Butterflies `` in their stomachs are easily settled by healing Reiki hands placed in the stomach area.

Reiki will help the child to concentrate during lessons while increasing their clarity. It will promote creativity within the classroom lessons as well as problem solving in areas of social interaction with classmates.

They will have a valuable tool to help them through the stresses of growing up. Reiki helps at times of stress in school like starting a new school, final exams, public speaking, important sporting events, or at times of emotional stress – when having to deal with bullies and harassment by other students.

Studies show that Reiki helps reduce depression. A high school in Camden, Maine, provided Reiki treatments to its students after the school lost eight students to drowning, car accidents, and suicide in six months. The school reported that the Reiki helped students cope with their grief and distress.

They learn to trust their abilities and intuition.

Kytka "Kit" Hilmar-Jezek, Reiki Master & Author of Reiki for Children states:

“Learning Reiki will enhance and instill in your child a greater sense of generosity, intuition, quietness, compassion, growth, joy, sacred-energy, happiness, love-of-god, self-love, creativity, harmony, loving-kindness, imagination, truth, beauty, goodness, equanimity, inspiration, attachment to nature, understanding, integrity, peace, wisdom and a connection to the Universal Life force, which is universal love. This Universal Love is the hope of a bright future on our planet.”

Imagine your child always feeling balanced and grounded. Imagine your child being able to help themselves or their family and friends when they are hurt, sad or afraid. Imagine your child always having confidence, a sense of clarity, a purpose, a knowing. Imagine your child always feeling safe and protected. All you have to do is imagine and the possibilities are endless with Reiki.

We all come into this world with an innate ability to heal ourselves, to balance our mind, body and spirit. Connecting children to Reiki at a young age is an extension of that ability. It offers them an opportunity to evolve with it, to nurture it and to use it as they need or want to. Growing up with Reiki, makes this a better world for them to live in and the more conscious they are (and the more conscious we become), the faster our world will be healed.

Our children are our future; why not provide them with a tool that will empower them as individuals. Why not give them the opportunity to begin now?

Give your child the Gift of Reiki because "Reiki and Children are like magic on earth"!

Written by Kathy Fee

Working with Behaviour Issues

2010-11-30T14:27:00Z

I was taught a key lesson by my cat when dealing with behaviour issues that I will share with you.

We have 4 cats in our home. First there is Topaz, my Bengal who is now 10 years old. I also have Abby who is 5 years old and the two of them get along fine. My youngest daughter moved away from the farm and got 2 cats of her own, Jude and Sadie who are now about 2 years old each. When my daughter moved back home with her cats, Topaz decided she was not going to have anything to do with Jude and Sadie in ‘her’ home. Topaz would chase them around the house and fight.

We have had to separate the cats into two parts of the home, 2 on the main floor and 2 on the upper level and luckily there are doors to separate them, which we keep closed, but the doors do have glass so the cats can still see each other.

Topaz, the alpha cat, started to ‘spray’ right at the door where she sees the other cats. This is obviously cat marking behaviour but not acceptable in my home.

My first instinct when I hear the cats calling at each other is to yell at them to break it up, sometimes chasing her away from the door. The incidents were getting worse and my attempts at talking to her, asking her to stop were falling on deaf ears. Her instinct was just too strong, I thought. Anger was mounting in the house and my husband was even suggesting we should find her a new home. This was not an acceptable solution to me.

I decided to talk with her again from a different place in my heart. I sat with her and tuned in; I opened my heart, and really asked her what was going on. She proceeded to tell me she missed the run of the house, she missed our old dog that passed away, she missed sitting on the couch with us and she wanted to be loved and live in peace too. I asked her “how can we stop this behaviour” and what I received back was “with Love, you can’t stop anger with anger it just doesn’t work”.

It was such an obvious answer to me, why didn’t I think of it before. Now when I hear her start to meow in the tone I know is her fighting tone, I go over and pick her up and cuddle her, open my heart, send her love and she settles down. She has started to come and sit with me again on the couch. She lies beside our new dog, Trinity, and wants to start a loving relationship with her. Trinity is still a bit too playful but time will fix that.

When animals act out it can be for various reasons. For behavioural issues I tend to go through the following steps to determine what to do:

Rule out any physical or medical issues that could be causing it, including medical help if needed.
Talk to them to determine if it is emotional issue. Ask them the following questions:

Why you are behaving this way?
How does this behaviour make you feel?
Is there something physical that is bothering you?
Is there something you need to help you?
What can I do for you?

3. If needed look into training programs to help you, such as Ceasar Millan’s programs for dogs
natural horsemanship for horses, etc.

My lesson in this situation was to open my heart and love. I have learned the same lesson with my horses recently and I am trying to do the same in all aspects of my life with remarkable results. I want to thank Topaz for another opportunity for a life lesson. I am happy to report she has made tremendous progress as well.

The Beatles had it right! All you need is Love.

Equine Soul Mates

2010-10-18T20:19:00Z

Horses have captivated mankind for centuries, not for their usefulness in doing, but because of their ability to expand us beyond the finite worlds we’ve created and propel us into an infinite and primal experience. Mankind’s use of language while being an invaluable tool has never the less quantified and confined our lives, experiences, and minds. This simplification has led to the small and restricted boxes we live in and has taken us away from the more abstract and ancient nature of true existence.

Horses force us to make the leap from literal to symbolic; they submerge us into an ever expanded state of simple being and mirror our hypocrisies back to us. In our silent interactions they teach us our inner strength and the power that lies in our bodies, emotions and intuitive urges, and communicate to us when we are disharmonized. Seeing as how they live in a constant state of “Nature” they teach us to be more natural. When we look into their eyes, we look deeply into the rejected and abandoned parts of ourselves; they teach us how to be whole. When we listen to the freedom of their silent calls, they teach us to be free.

When we bypass language as the only means of relating and expressing our inner realities, as we are forced to do with Horses, then we connect and share on a deeper more profound level of ourselves; our most basic and vulnerable places. Our relationships become sacred, deep and we begin to learn a new innate communication that irrevocably changes us for the better. Divinity is felt deep within; it is ignited. Through this ignition we ascend to a fearless place where the laws of time and space no longer have meaning. A place where all the lies we’ve been fed by ourselves and others fall away and what we’ve always suspected and prayed to be true is known;

“We are good,

We do have everything to offer,

We are Divine

And we are worthy of perfect love”

Charlotte Brammer

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